We admit it’s hard to think of a clever and catchy first line to send on Bumble. Many of the matches I made on the app almost failed because I was so concerned and confused about what to send. I wanted to sound witty and cool, but I also wanted to be myself and let my personality shine through.
I have a love-hate relationship with Bumble. On the one hand, I love it because the app looks clean and clear, and I know how it works. I also like the app setup process. Something I kind of hate about Bumble is that the women have to message first.
While I understand the rule, and it’s honestly nice to not get bombarded with endless first messages of ‘Hi’ and ‘Wuts up,’ I miss the aspect of being pursued and making the guy sweat a bit.
That being said, I talked to my fiancé who was an avid Bumble user at the time we met and was even paying for a premium subscription to the app, and he said that a lot of girls would still opt for that ‘Hi’ introduction and let the men still do the heavy lifting. While I appreciate that approach, I always feel as though I have to be the best at everything and present myself in the best light, so I still decided to give everyone I messaged a brilliant opener.
But if you’re stuck on what to say when you first message someone, don’t worry; it’s more than natural. A lot of people get stuck on that first step, and then they lose the connection. Bumble only gives you a certain amount of time to message someone until they disconnect the two of you.
If you’re stuck on what to say in the first message that will capture your matches’ heart and also make you stand out from the pack, we don’t want you to lose a chance at connecting with someone or finding love just because you aren’t sure about what to say. So we’re giving you our favorite openers you can send on Bumble to make you shine and stand out.
One of the best ways to get a conversation going on Bumble is to ask your match questions. These can be pointed questions about something you’ve seen on their profile that stood out or that the two of you have in common, or they can be questions that will just start a conversation.
If you’re not sure what to ask, think about what you would like to be asked. Many people steer conversations to highlight their better qualities. If you’re an athlete, ask your match if they play any sports. If you love to read, ask about their favorite books they’ve read in the past year.
You can also ask your match about any activities they enjoy or what their perfect first date would look like. This question can help in the long run when trying to figure out what to do for a date. It can also help when you assess if your lifestyles and activity levels match each other. While we wouldn’t suggest that you write someone off because they like football and you like theatre, it’s an excellent way to see if the two of you will clash in life or collab in the long run.
Asking questions is also a fantastic gateway to see if the conversation continues to flow or if your match just answers the question and ends the conversation. If they’re responding in one-worded or lazy ways, that can indicate how little they care about your interactions.
Allow this stage to be the bare minimum in the getting-to-know-each-other process. Don’t put too much pressure on either of you to perform or present yourselves in a certain way. Instead, see if you like each other and can have a basic conversation.
Okay, now that we’ve hyped up the power of these questions a lot, let’s get to our favorite options.
- What was the last thing you binge-watched?
- What’s your go-to streaming service?What is your favorite comfort movie or TV show, and why?
- If you could have dinner with one celebrity, dead or alive, who would it be and why?
- What’s one podcast you’d love to be a guest on?
- What’s one movie that you believe is better than the book?
- Are you a reader?
- Is there a book you have read more than once?
- Is there a book you own more than one copy of?
- What was the last movie you saw in theaters?
- What’s a movie you believe should only be seen in theaters?
- What are you reading right now?
- What is your favorite genre of music?
- If you made a playlist for yourself, what would you name it?
- What’s one album you could listen to on repeat for the rest of your life?
About Their Personal Interests
- What is one thing you have to do every weekend?
- If you could go on a road trip anywhere, where would you choose and why?
- What is one national monument you would really like to see?
- Are you a pet person?/What is your favorite thing to do with your pet?
- Did you move to [the town you’re in] for a job or another reason?
- What’s your favorite sport to watch?
- What’s your favorite sport to play?
- What’s one hobby that you love but are terrible at?
- What’s your favorite household chore to do?
- What’s one store you wish you could go to every single day?
- What’s something strange or geeky that you’re obsessed with?
- What’s something you’re weirdly competitive about?
- Which fictional character do you most relate to and why?
About Their Job
- Do you work a typical 9-5, or are you a work-from-home person?
- If you could spend your paycheck on anything, what would it be?
- What would you be if you could be anything and money and schooling weren’t an issue?
- What did you want to be when you grew up?
- What do you like most about your job?
- Would you continue to do your job if you weren’t getting paid?
About Date Ideas
- What is your ideal first date?
- Are you more in favor of staying in on dates or going out?
- What’s your favorite restaurant to go to in the city?
- What’s your favorite thing to do in the city?
- What is your favorite thing to cook?
- What’s your comfort food?
- What have you always wanted to do but have yet to try?
- What would you do if you were invisible for the day?
- If you were a plant, what kind of plant would you be?
- If you were a color, what color would you be?
- What is one superpower you think you have?
- How many times do you hit snooze in the morning?
- What would your friends say you’re the most known for?
- What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?
- What’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever done?
- What’s the weirdest fun fact you know?
- If we were playing trivia, what category would you crush?
- What’s your go-to karaoke song?
- If you could give yourself a nickname, what would it be?
- What never fails to make you cry-laugh?
- What never fails to make you cry?
- How would you ask me to prom if we were in high school?
- What’s your love language?
- What’s the best date you’ve ever been on?
- What’s something that your parents don’t know about you?
- What is one piece of advice you wish everyone knew?
- What is one cause you’re extremely passionate about?
- What is your greatest accomplishment?
- What’s something that impresses you about other people?
- Why did you swipe on me?
- If you could make one assumption about me, what would it be?
- If you could cast a movie about my life, who would you get to play me?
- What is one thing in my profile you’re concerned about?
- Do you have a type? Do I fit into that type?
Listen, you’re on a dating app to have some fun, so go crazy with it. If you don’t need to know your matches’ favorite childhood memory or you’re not really in the mood to have a deep conversation, try sending them a flirty or funny one-liner.
I have messaged people back on one-liners many times because they’re clever, and they show that the person put effort into messaging me, even if it didn’t lead to a deep in-depth conversation about our feelings.
One-liners also make people feel more comfortable because you’re putting yourself out there while waiting to see your matches’ response to your silliness.
I love one-liners because they start the relationship on a light foot and proclaim that you’re just here for a good time.
Here are some of our favorite one-liners you can send to your Bumble matches.
- Were you on The Bachelor? I swear I’ve seen you!
- Hey, I’m writing an article on the finer things in life, could I interview you?
- So, when’s our wedding?
- Would you mind filling out a quick survey? I just need your phone number and your favorite place to go to dinner. Say, Friday?
- You seem like a busy bee; would you mind adding me to your to-do list?
- Are you a bank loan? Because you have my interest.
- I’m researching important dates in history, would you be mine?
- Do you believe in love at first sight, or should we match again?
- What do you call several people waiting to get cheddar? A cheesy pickup line.
- All your pictures look like they were taken on a 45º angle, so I guess you’re acute-y.
- Do you like cheese? Would you like to brie with me? Oh, I’m sorry — was that too cheesy?
- Do you know what I have in common with the Little Mermaid? We both want to be part of your world.
- Do you play Quidditch? Because you’re a keeper.
- Truth or dare?
- Your profile made me stop in my tracks.
- Are you a gardener? I like your tulips.
- Would you rather do drinks or coffee this week?
- Are you German? Because I’d like to be Ger-man!
- I think I saw you on Spotify. Are you the hottest new single?
- What are we doing Friday night?
- Are you my laptop? Because you’re hot, and I’m concerned.
- Do you have an Instagram? My mother always told me to follow my dreams.
- We matched! Does this mean you’re going out with me tonight, or do we need to establish that we’re not serial killers living in our parents’ basement first?
- On a scale from one to the United States of America, how free are you tonight?
- I just bought a kiss-proof lipstick, but I need to do some research. Could you come over and test it out for me?
- Titanic. That’s my icebreaker.
- Did you do something to my eyes? Because I can’t take them off of you.
- Excuse me, do you have a band-aid? Because I scraped my knee falling for you.
- How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice!
- This is my opening line ——-
- Hi, are you busy? Do you have an extra few minutes so I can tell you how gorgeous you are?
- I’m new in town. Can I get directions to your apartment?
- Are you my appendix? Because you give me a word and a tingly feeling, and I really want to take you out.
- FMK: queso, sala, guacamole?
If you’re not about the one-liners or the questions, don’t stress. You can still find loads of success on dating apps if you don’t open with one of these options.
Look at your match’s profile and see what you want to talk to them about. There’s a reason the two of you matched, so you must have something in common with them. If they talk about their dog, ask about its name and what they like to do with it. That’s an easy slide-in because everyone loves to talk about their pets.
If you see that the two of you went to or are going to the same college, talk about that and the classes they took. Who knows? You might have passed each other in the hallway before. If you’ve heard of the college they went to, you can also ask them about that. Ask them if they actually used their major. People love to talk about that. You can also bring up sports if their alma mater is a big sports school. That way, you also know what you’re in for when Saturday night football comes on.
If none of these options work for you, you can always go the safe route and just say hi or ask them what they’re doing and why they’re on the app. Not every message needs to be hilarious or lead to a long conversation.
You can also jump the gun and ask them out immediately if you’re really attracted to them, but we suggest you try to get to know them a bit first for safety reasons.
You can also start playing games when you slide in. I’m a big fan of two truths and a lie, or truth or dare. This way, your conversation is interactive but still light-hearted at its core.
While all these options are fun, we encourage you to choose the one that makes you feel comfortable and makes the most sense. If you hate movies, don’t talk about them. If you want to keep it casual, don’t ask your match about the deep things right away.
Dating apps are fun. The conversations you’ll have with them can be some of the best conversations you’ll ever have. Don’t put too much pressure to be perfect, clever, or witty in the first 120 characters. You’ll have the time for that later. For now, just have fun, explore, and get to know each other in a low-stakes environment.