Well, dear readers, we have almost reached the end of the long dirt track that serves as a road on our Farmer Wants a Wife journey.
In Farmer Wants a Wife episode 6, each of our four farmers will be one step closer to choosing who they’ll marry and settle down with on their respective farmsteads. Or maybe they won’t choose anyone. Or, perhaps they’ll be turned down after a heartfelt proposal! Who knows! It’s reality tv, and anything could happen—but we’re pretty sure nothing too dramatic will take place.
Why? First, this show is TAME compared to other dating competition series. And tame might be too generous a term— more like chaste. Secondly, it’s only the sixth episode out of eight. That’s a really short arc for an entire relationship-to-marriage sitch, even when it’s one-on-one dating, never mind five women competing for each farmer’s hand.
So, make sure your arms and legs are safely inside the tractor while it slowly ambles through the field at all times, and let’s get it cropping.
The Last Women Standing
Here we are on our sixth date, and host Jennifer Nettles tells us that each of the farmers is heading out on solo dates right off the bat.
Hunter has picked Meghan to go to his family farm (this man has TWO farms) for a lil’ horseback riding to check the cattle and the fending. It’s work, but also a date.
They seem to get along, and then her horse bolts! Meghan was hanging on for dear life, and she lost his cowboy hat in the chaos. They hold hands while riding back to his second farm and share a smooch (no tongue).
Over at Allen’s place, his date with Rebecca’s date is put on hold after one of his cows gives birth to twins, but she only accepts one of them (that’s really sad!)
They tend to the rejected calf, and she carries the adorable calf to the jeep/golf cart, and Allen seems impressed. They bottle-feed the baby, and then they saddle up for their actual date.
Ryan chooses Sarah with an H for his solo date; they get all dressed up and done at a sort of fancy restaurant. Their vibe is good; they sip wine and talk about each other’s past relationships. He feeds her scallops, and they make out (with tongue, thank you, Mother Nature). If he doesn’t pick Sarah with an H, I will be flabbergasted. Flabbergasted, I say!
Back to Allen, they go riding, and since she is a horse trainer, they race, and she beats him. They picnic as the sun sets, and she questions him about his past relationships. He says cowboys are taught to just “get on with it,” and he acknowledges he has trouble expressing his emotions (duh).
Farmer Landon takes Ashley L on a solo date to a ranch picnic tailgate date, which sounds like a tongue twister. They sit in the back of a pickup truck (this is his go-to move, he did this with another woman) and drink beer. Ashley tells him she’s ready to leave the city for a quiet place—like a farm. She’s on the right show!
Hunter introduces Meghan to his family, and while they’re eating dinner, they absolutely grill her (that’s fair!).
They dance in the truck’s headlights, and she says it’s a “dream date.” There is some kissing (can’t tell if there was tongue, the camera operator shot from the back).
Everyone is working on the farms, and we are going to skip to the good parts because this is becoming a boring TLDR, and we need to know who is potentially getting hitched and who’s getting ditched!!
Meghan ends up bowing out because her grandfather passed away, and Landon takes her to the airport. RIP Meghan’s grandpa.
Allen takes the coward’s way out and decides to keep all his remaining four ladies. Classic Allen. Cassidy Jo is pissed, and she wishes he would make some cuts.
Landon also chickens out and keeps all of his women. Booooo.
Over at Hunter’s place, his three remaining prospects worry because he had a strong connection with Meghan. They say grace before dinner, and he prays for Meghan—he leaves the table before the meal is over, tells the camera that he’s “done with this,” and walks off. I think he means the interview, but we’ll see next week.
Ryan gathers his four picks around a bonfire and tells them he’s thinking about sending someone home and needs a minute to think and retreats to his house.
What a bombshell (joking, this is what is SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN). Ryan returns and tells Haley that she is out because she’s “too emotional.” Ouch. She gives him a hug and seems to take the rejection rather well. There are a few tears because, as Ryan says, she’s “too emotional.”
And that’s it for this week’s recap! But before we go, we have to talk about this week’s relationship topic—dealing with rejection.
How to Handle Rejection
Dating can be (and often is) exhausting and full of heartbreaking rejections. On the heels of the Farmer Wants a Wife finale and the jilted women who were not chosen to be the wife of a farmer, we are going to talk about some good ways to deal with rejection when it comes to love and dating.
It’s possible to learn to deal with rejections in a way that builds confidence rather than erodes it instead of angrily withdrawing from dating altogether.
Take a Breath
Give yourself some breathing room; it’s common to rush out and find a new partner after experiencing rejection, especially if it’s been happening repeatedly.
If the split happened last night and you’re already downloading dating apps, you may want to take a moment to collect your thoughts. Don’t give in to the impulse, but give yourself permission to be sad and sit with it for a while if you are able to.
While you are grieving, you can look into the reasons you are struggling. Do your dates all seem to be giving you the same answers? Or maybe you’re only after a specific kind of person who doesn’t seem to appreciate you.
Even if you are sending conflicting signals, it can be helpful for you to be able to objectively determine whether or not you are, in fact, contributing to the self-sabotage cycle when it comes to relationships.
Be careful not to draw the wrong assumptions! Most of the time, rejection is not as personal as people think. Don’t make up a more upsetting excuse for your potential partner’s lack of communication if they claim they’re too busy at work to respond to your texts in a timely manner. In other words, don’t spin out until you know the actual issue.
Be Kind to Yourself
When reflecting, it’s important to keep past experiences apart from your worth.
Evidence suggests that if something keeps happening to you, it must be because you are unworthy or undesirable, but in reality, we may not always be treated according to our worth.
Avoid Comparing Yourself to Others
Rejection hurts in part because it makes you feel alone, and this can make you feel inferior to your loved-up friends as you continue to go on date after date. If you want to treat yourself with kindness and compassion, you need to stop comparing yourself to others and resist the need to see the world through a scarcity perspective.
That’s the worry that there aren’t enough people out there for you, but in reality, there are plenty of people who share your interests and are actively seeking connections.
Be with People Who Care about You
When we start dating again after being turned down a lot, it can change the kind of treatment we’re willing to accept. When you feel uncertain and inadequate, it can change your choices and who you let in. You might feel “lucky” just for getting someone to call you back.
Instead of hoping that a stranger will make you feel better about yourself, spend time with people who like being around you. It would be best if you repaired your sense of self-worth so that you can re-enter the dating world, knowing who you really are and what you bring to relationships.
Sure, you could live your whole life never dating, but then you’d never experience the happiness of falling in love.
The key is to ‘lick your wounds,’ talk about your emotions with a therapist if you need to, and keep playing the field until you meet someone who appreciates your great qualities. If you keep dating, the bad memories will be wiped away and replaced by pleasant ones and better experiences.
If there’s one thing you can take away from experiencing rejection, it’s that you shouldn’t allow it to discourage you from pursuing what you want in the future. Rejection is a normal part of life that even the most successful people have to deal with.
The next time you are rejected by a date or get dropped, tell yourself that it happens to everyone, and instead of letting it destroy you, think about what you can do to push forward.